I was a butler and estate manager for billionaires — here are 7 surprising insights I learned from the inside (2024)

• David Youdovin is the founder and CEO of Hire Society, a staffing agency that helps wealthy families find and hire private household help.
• Prior to starting his own company, Youdovin worked as a butler and estate manager forone of the world's richest billionaire families.
• The experience taught him that wealthy individuals value their families above all else, and that private service isn't a lowly job.

More often than not when conjuring an image of a butler, people think of Alfred from Batman, or Carson from Downton Abbey — grey-haired, British, and well-mannered. That's not really the case.

In the summer of 2005, I was in my early 20s working my way up the Wall Street corporate ladder, having left a fulfilling but non-lucrative career in hospitality.

I made the shift to finance thinking that although I loved hospitality, I wasn't going to break six-figures if I stayed in the industry. Thankfully, I was proven wrong when a friend reached out to ask for help producing an event for an ultra-high-net-worth private family in the Hamptons.

I accepted what I thought would be a nice weekend break from summer in the city, and soon found myself on a new career path in private service.

As the weekend drew to a close, I knew I would be leaving my job in finance to begin working for one of the world's wealthiest private families as a butler and estate manager. I stayed in that position for a year and a half before leaving to found my own recruiting and staffing company.

Here are seven surprising things I learned while working for a billionaire family:

1. Family is everything

There is no point amassing a huge fortune if you don't have people close to you to share it with. Family always came first to my employer.

2. You are nothing without your health

My principal was very concerned about his health and wellness, as well as the health and wellness of his family and friends, and had a full-time medical staff, including doctors and nurses, available to him and his family at all times. This was in addition to the many medical facilities which bare his name.

He also taught me that in addition to base salaries, providing full benefits packages to employees created a culture of health and loyalty.

3. People are just people, regardless of their net worth

I had the privilege of meeting a wide cross-section of society as a result of my position. I found that regardless of net worth, if you treat people with respect, they will do the same in return regardless of their position, title, or size of their bank account.

4. A penny saved is a penny earned

Despite a ten-figure net worth, my employer was a stickler for saving, and was keen to negotiate. Once while reading the Sunday Times, he pulled a coupon and left it for the housekeepers to use while shopping.When a billionaire takes time to save fifty cents on laundry detergent, that tells you something.

5. Live to give

Despite being mindful of savings wherever and whenever possible, my employer was by far the most generous person I've ever known.Most people think private service professionals work as servants for low wages and no quality of life, living in a basem*nt closet, on call 24/7. In actuality, these positions can be pretty glamorous, paying high salaries, offering full non-contributory medical, dental, and vision plans, 401(k)s, paid time-off, generous bonus structures, expense accounts, luxurious accommodations, and room for growth, among other perks.

And when it came to philanthropy, I watched as my employer gave tens of millions annually to hospitals, environmental causes, human rights organizations, and cultural institutions to advance the arts.

6. Life is beautiful, and so is art

What little I knew about art prior to working in private service was quickly replaced with a true appreciation as I worked with private curators, insurers, lighters, and hangers to assist in caring for the family's incredible collection of contemporary art.

7. Private service is not a lowly job

The private service industry has evolved and often pulls the best workers from hotels, restaurants, and luxury services for a dynamic mix of people who are energetic and able to wear multiple hats. Their enthusiasm for the craft is palpable. If they lack in expertise, employers often pay to further their educations with culinary classes, hospitality courses, and seminars.

Many people believe housekeeping and grounds-keeping are basic skills anyone who maintains their own home possesses. The skills required in these areas far exceed any expectations I could have imagined and parallel the standards of running a 5-star resort.