Decoupling Your Finances: How to Divide Your Money in a Divorce (2024)

Divorce can be messy, not least from the financial viewpoint. Disentangling your finances from those of your former spouse can be incredibly complicated. If you find yourself in the middle of a divorce, follow these steps to cover your bases and recover your assets.

Key Takeaways

  • Close joint bank accounts and, if you don’t already have one, open your own.
  • Get a copy of your credit report to identify all the credit cards and loans attached to both spouses. Close any joint credit lines.
  • Prepare to divide the assets you have in investment and retirement accounts. Retirement accounts have specific rules dictating how this is done.
  • If you and your ex own a home, you’ll have to decide who will keep it or sell it and split the proceeds. If you get the house and it has a mortgage that still needs to be paid off, you’ll need to refinance it in your name only.

Community vs. Separate Property

Your first consideration is how your state views property ownership in a marriage. The law guiding how assets will be divided could be community property or separate property.

  • Community property includes any possessions gained during the marriage. Both spouses equally own marital assets including property acquired, income earned, and debts accrued while married.
  • Separate property allows a spouse to remain in control of their original assets. If you owned property before your marriage or bought assets with an inheritance, for example, you keep ownership of those assets.

Bank Accounts

Most couples have at least one joint bank account, and handling these should be at the top of your list when untangling assets in a divorce. Start by creating a comprehensive list of your accounts. For now, don't worry about whether they arejointly owned. You need to establish a record of every bank account in existence. Then you can proceed with dividing the shared ones.

When you've completed your list, make a note of which are joint accounts. If you and your spouse are still friendly, visit the bank together to close the accounts. It's the quickest way to dissolve the shared account.

If you're not on good enough terms for a joint trip to the bank, you probably won’t be able to close the account until the two of you reach a divorce settlement.

In the meantime, you'll want to open a new bank account exclusively for yourself, if you don't already have one.

When getting a divorce, establishing your own financial identity is critical. Opening your own bank account, if you don't already have one, is the first step.

Credit Cards and Loans

Not sure how many cards your soon-to-be-ex has? Maybe even forgotten a few of your own? Obtaining a copy of your credit report will help you identify all the credit cards and loans attached to both spouses.

Read the fine print to determine whether you’re a joint owner or just an authorized user.

Keep in mind that having an independent credit history is of paramount importance, whether you’re married, getting a divorce, or single. Now is the time to apply for a credit card in only your name if you don’t already have one.

As for existing joint credit and loan accounts—for example, credit cards, personal loans, and car loans—you have three choices for handling each one:

  1. You can agree to pay them off now.
  2. You can agree to pay them off later.
  3. You can do nothing.

The most efficient option is to settle the balances immediately and close the accounts as soon as possible. This reduces the risk to your credit score that your ex will forget to pay a bill or go on a spending spree.

If you agree to close the accounts now, even if you’re not paying them off in full, you can still lower the risk of impacting your credit. Most credit card companies allow you to close the account to further purchases and pay off the balance over time.

Notice the options include the language “agree to.” In a divorce, it isn’t advisable to manage joint assets or accounts on your own. If both parties can’t agree on how to handle the credit cards and loans, you might be stuck with option number three: doing nothing.

Note that if you have a credit card in your name but your soon-to-be-ex is an authorized user you don't need their permission to remove them. It's also wise to remove yourself as an authorized user on any of their credit cards.

Investment and Retirement Accounts

Clarifying the division of investments isn’t as straightforward as credit cards and bank accounts. Knowing the exact details of each account is crucial before agreeing on how to allocate the funds.

For instance, the actual value could vary from the perceived value because investments often carry different levels of risk or have specific taxes and fees that apply. And there’s risk tolerance to consider, too. If you’re more conservative, it can make sense to let your spouse keep the riskier investments.

Sometimes liquidation is the best option. Because transfer and withdrawal fees can be costly, be mindful of the charges that apply before you go this route. If you determine this is the best option, many experts recommend selling the investments first to share the tax burden of capital gains.

The division of retirement assets involves specific requirements depending on the type of account. Most plans and accounts have rules that must be followed when dividing retirement assets in a divorce. For example, aqualified domestic relations order (QDRO) is a court order used to divide specific types of retirement plans, including 401(k) and 403(b) plans.

Your Home

If you and your soon-to-be-ex own a home, your bank will not allow you to remove one spouse from the mortgage just because you’re getting a divorce. To get the home in your name only, the process requires you to refinance it. And qualifying on your own for the loan can be tough if you are a nonworking spouse.

If you cannot be approved in just your name, the most viable option might be selling the home and dividing the proceeds.

Alternatively, you could leave both names on the house, though it’s a much more complicated solution that requires a co-ownership agreement as part of the divorce. If you're not on great terms, you may not want to continue carrying an enormous financial burden with your ex.

Seek Professional Help

At a time when your mind and emotions are likely a mess, don't take any risks with your finances. Be wary of well-meaning advice from friends and co-workers, and consult with professionals—such as an attorney and certified divorce financial analyst (CDFA)—on the proper way to disentangle your bank, investment, and credit accounts, as well as any other shared property you'll now need to divide.

This is a crucial time to rely on professionals to make sure you've checked every box, found every account, and fully protected yourself from financial damage.

How Do I Separate My Finances in a Divorce?

Close any joint bank accounts. Open your own account if you don’t already have one. Check your credit report from the three main credit bureaus to identify all credit cards and loans that you share with your spouse. Close any joint credit lines.

You’ll also need to divide the assets you have in investment and retirement accounts. If you own a home with your spouse, decide who keeps it, or sell it and split any proceeds. If the home has a mortgage and you want to keep it in your name only, you’ll need to refinance the loan.

What Is Community Property?

Instates with community property laws, each spouse is considered to own a share of the marital assets, including any financial or real assets acquired during the marriage.

Nine states have community property laws: California, Arizona, Nevada, Louisiana, Idaho, New Mexico, Washington, Texas, and Wisconsin.

The rest of the states have separate property laws. Each spouse retains ownership of assets brought to the marriage.

What Is a Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO)?

A qualified domestic relations order (QDRO) is a court order used to divide the retirement assets held inemployer-sponsored plans such as 401(k)s and403(b)s. IRAs are divided using a process known as "transfer incident to divorce." These are necessary steps to take when dividing retirement assets as part of a divorce settlement.

The Bottom Line

If you're getting a divorce, both you and your soon-to-be-ex spouse need to move on. Re-establishing your financial status as a single person is important to both of you. Take care of the red tape now to avoid financial trouble down the road.

Decoupling Your Finances: How to Divide Your Money in a Divorce (2024)

FAQs

Decoupling Your Finances: How to Divide Your Money in a Divorce? ›

Close joint bank accounts and, if you don't already have one, open your own. Get a copy of your credit report to identify all the credit cards and loans attached to both spouses. Close any joint credit lines. Prepare to divide the assets you have in investment and retirement accounts.

How to separate finances during a divorce? ›

Here are the first steps:
  1. Separate Your Bank Accounts and Credit Cards. The first and easiest step toward separating your finances is to establish separate bank accounts and credit cards. ...
  2. Separate Your Non-Marital Assets. ...
  3. Divide Individual Debt. ...
  4. Educate yourself. ...
  5. Gather documentation. ...
  6. Consult a professional.

Who loses more financially in a divorce? ›

Truth be told, on average a woman can expect an almost 30% decline in her standard of living following divorce, while men often see an increase of 10%.

Who is better off financially after divorce? ›

We're still living in a world where men make more than women, and 69% of husbands make more than their wives. So when a couple gets divorced, the woman's household income drops more than the man's. Finally, data actually shows that women are more negatively affected after a divorce, both financially and emotionally.

How is wealth divided in divorce? ›

While state laws vary on how judges divide marital property, the general rule is to assess assets the couple co-owned or co-managed (such as a residence, bank account, or retirement account) and divide them equitably between spouses.

Can I empty my bank account before divorce? ›

Key Takeaway: Do not remove any funds from a joint bank account before the divorce proceedings are complete. The judge may award your spouse with a larger portion of the community property resources if you acted in bad faith. A prenuptial agreement may affect the rights you have to your financial assets.

Are separate bank accounts safe from divorce? ›

The court may consider separate bank accounts jointly-owned.

While you may think that separate property would always include the bank account you established prior to your wedding, merely keeping separate accounts may not provide the legal protection that couples are looking for.

Who leaves most often in divorce? ›

Around 69% of divorces in heterosexual marriages are initiated by women.

What do men lose in divorce? ›

Men Often Experience a Loss of Identity

But when a divorce happens, men lose most of it – the spouse, the children, the familial bond, and the happiness. The custody of the children is often given to the mother, while the father only gets the visitation rights.

Who gets divorced more rich or poor couples? ›

In the United States, wealthier couples have lower divorce risk. Wealth may stabilize marriage through its material value, especially by easing financial stress, or by providing symbolic resources, especially signaling that couples meet normative financial standards for marriage.

Why is moving out the biggest mistake in a divorce? ›

Documents such as insurance policies, bank statements, and information about retirement accounts are vital for divorce proceedings, and moving out may make them harder to access. Some spouses have even gone as far as destroying or hiding important documents in an attempt to gain a more favorable outcome in the divorce.

Who is usually happier after divorce? ›

Women are “significantly more content than usual for up to five years following the end of their marriages, even more so than their own average or baseline level of happiness throughout their lives,” according to a 2013 study from London's Kingston University.

Does my husband have to pay the bills until we are divorced? ›

Until you have a court order, any property or debt from your marriage still belongs to both of you. This is true no matter who is using it or who has it with them. The same is true of debts.

How to split finances when divorcing? ›

There are three common options for handling debt in a divorce:
  1. Agree to pay off all balances from marital assets.
  2. Agree for each spouse to maintain loans or debts in their individual name and continue making respective payments post-divorce. ...
  3. Agree on a detailed plan to pay off joint liabilities post-divorce.
Jan 28, 2022

How do I protect my money in a divorce? ›

How Do I Protect Myself Financially From My Spouse During a...
  1. Create a Financial Plan for Your Divorce. ...
  2. Open Your Own Bank Account. ...
  3. Separate Your Debt. ...
  4. Monitor Your Credit Score. ...
  5. Take an Inventory of Your Assets. ...
  6. Review Your Retirement Accounts. ...
  7. Consider Mediation Before Litigation. ...
  8. Popular Family Law Articles.
Aug 9, 2023

What is the income disparity in a divorce? ›

Income disparity can significantly impact the lower-income spouse's ability to meet immediate financial needs. Therefore, the short-term needs of that spouse need to be addressed first. Legal help from experienced divorce attorneys often helps secure temporary financial support through alimony.

How do you split finances when one spouse makes more? ›

Income-Based Percentage

In some relationships, one partner's income might be far higher than the other partner's income. It may feel unfair for the lower-earning partner to contribute equally. So, if Partner A makes $60,000 and Partner B makes $40,000, you might split bills using a 60-40 division.

How do I protect my bank account during divorce? ›

Open Your Own Bank Account

Most couples choose to establish a joint bank account when they get married. During a divorce, though, you should set up a bank account solely in your name as soon as possible. This step is especially important for spouses without jobs or who have been stay-at-home parents before the divorce.

How do I secure my finances before divorce? ›

Separate Debt To Financially Protect Assets

You're still liable for any debt your spouse racks up on jointly held accounts. It's best to leave marriages with no debt, or only the debt that's yours. Straub recommends that if you have the money to pay off your joint credit cards, do so and then close the accounts.

How do you split finances when not married? ›

Keep separate accounts, but make equal payments

Many people find it easiest to maintain separate financial accounts with their own funds. From there, they contribute equally to shared expenses.

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